June 2016 | |
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IN THIS ISSUE:
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FEATURED Article
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Copyright © 2016 by Dr. Wendy Lyon and The Relationship Coaching Institute. All rights reserved in all media. Used with permission.
Dr. Wendy Lyon,has helped hundreds of individuals and couples to transform their lives and create great relationships for over 20 years, as a psychology professor, personal development teacher, master certified relationship and life coach, workshop and retreat facilitator, speaker, and author. She is the co-author of Roadmap to Success with Deepak Chopra and Ken Blanchard, and has been interviewed on ABC's View from the Bay and other TV and radio shows. There are a few spaces left in her upcoming Transformation and Yoga Retreat in Maui, Hawaii. See www.DrWendyLyon.com to learn more, get your free True Love Test and an excerpt of her Roadmap to Relationship Success. | |
Ask Our Coaches |
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I like my best friend's, best friend. How can we make this work without anyone getting hurt?Dear Coaches,My best friend (a girl) has another best friend (a guy). While they never dated, they did "hook up" a few times. Now they're just really great friends. I really like the guy and he really likes me, but we're both worried about how it will affect our relationships with her if we get serious. How can we make this work without anyone getting hurt? ![]() Wendy responds ...You and your two friends have a great opportunity for open, direct communication, telling the truth honestly and honoring each other's feelings. It would probably be easier for your female friend to hear from one of you at a time and it can be as simple as "'Guy' and I really like each other and we are interested in dating. I want to make sure you would be comfortable with that because I care about you very much and wouldn't want to hurt you. How would you feel if your two best friends were a couple?" And, despite everyone's best intentions, there's no guarantee that someone won't get hurt. Just make sure you don't withhold important information from each other, do treat each other with respect and share your concerns openly. Wendy Lyon | www.DrWendyLyon.com ![]() Lewis responds ...Unfortunately, you have no control over whether your girlfriend will choose to feel hurt. Firstly, she may feel hurt that you didn't trust her with the information before you two got involved. In that case, it may be too late. Even if you and your boyfriend eventually break up and then you tell her, she may be upset that you didn't trust her. Second issue: she may feel jealous that you have a boyfriend and she doesn't. She is likely to feel hurt until she is in a relationship. Third issue: she may feel abandoned by both of you. While you and your boyfriend are hanging out, she doesn't get to be with either of you. The old cliché holds true here: honesty is the best policy. Sorry. You must face your fear and tell her. To preserve your friendship, I suggest you tell her soon. Rather than you and the guy telling her together, I would tell her that you both wanted her to know and decided that you would be the one to tell her. Be understanding. Acknowledge her feelings. At the same time, know that you have the right to investigate a relationship with your boyfriend. Lewis Denbaum | www.madlyinloveforever.com ![]() Kemi responds ...How loyal are you to your friend? Have you both (you and the guy) tried to sit your friend down and make your intentions known to her? Do you think having a conversation with her and letting her know you both like each other will help move things forward? Have you also had a conversation with the guy to find out if your requirements, needs and wants will be met? Think about these and try to hold a conversation with your friend and the guy to get a good understanding of where your friend stands. This may help you all move forward without hurting anyone. Kemi Sogunle | www.kemisogunle.com The opinions stated are those of the authors and not necessarily those of the staff, members, or leadership of Relationship Coaching Institute. This column answers questions submitted by our readers. Submit your question here and it will be forwarded to our coaches all over the world. Each issue, we'll publish a few answers from our RCI coaches. Announcements | |
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Darlene Steele | Editor, Conscious Dating Singles News | CONTACT DARLENE Copyright © 2016 by Relationship Coaching Institute. All rights reserved. Feel free to share this with others as long as our contact information and authorship is included. |